Friday, 20 March 2015

The Fault In Our Stars

I've just watched the fault in our stars for the third time, and EVERYTIME I watch this movie, it causes me some seriously deep thinking!
I moan about diabetes, who doesn't? I moan about needles, having no break etc. But then I sit and watch TFIOS and feel lucky that I am diabetic. Weird right?! Suddenly the needles seem so insignificant and diabetes appears easy to me, compared to what Hazel and Augustus and their parents have to face. The two of them get death sentences. And okay yeah, type 1 can be fatal, but ever so rarely! What they're going through is so awful (well, they're fictional characters, so actually, what people in their situation are going through really) that I feel really bad for moaning about diabetes!
I end up promising myself never to moan about diabetes again! I always end up breaking that promise anyway, and then I want to kick myself for moaning-_- If I rant at my friends about it, I feel bad because they don't fully understand it of course and so I feel like I'm attention seeking, for something that in the grand scheme of things definitely isn't the worst thing that could happen to me! Talking to other diabetics is better, but I don't want it to come across as 'I'm in a worse situation than you' type thing. And my mum, I like to talk to her about my struggles or whatever, but she's in probably just as bad a position as I am, if not worse. Because it's bad enough having the condition, but even worse having a child with it I'm sure! So I don't want to burden her in a way, or make her feel down about it or something. 
Perhaps I could let out my frustration on here, instead of feel bad about venting at my friends! (Is venting a word??? I mean ranting and moaning:)) 
So, I have been doing some deep thinking this evening.......!

2 comments:

  1. As the mum of a girl with diabetes I can tell you you will never make your mum feel down by offloading to her. She would feel worse if she thought you were struggling with your feelings and not confiding in her. You and her are in it together. You have a brilliant message here though - there is always someone who has a worse time than you. That said, that doesn't mean you aren't justified in having a moan sometimes and feeling sorry for yourself. It's a pig of a thing to live with, and you guys with it are inspirational for the attitudes you have to life.

    Blogging is massively therapeutic for so many people - it's brilliant that you've started up again. I will get my daughter to have a read (she's in the process of setting up her own blog). Good luck with the writing :)

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    1. Hi, I talk with my mum a lot, we're very close actually! But I hate to burden other people with my worries, mainly because I don't want to appear attention seeking (in regards to non diabetic and diabetic friends). And in regards to taking with my mum, I feel like I don't want to make a fuss out of nothing, whether it is or not.
      And I really enjoy blogging, in a few years time I can read back all my old posts and remember little details I would otherwise forget! I will definitely keep on blogging for as long as I can:)

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